Just when I feel that we’re making headway with Zach and his bed-wetting problem, we seem to take two steps back. He had done so well for about a month. He was staying dry every night, and even admitted that he was able to tell that he had to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night (even if he wasn’t willing to get up to go). That in itself was a huge admission. It’s what we’ve been struggling with. Certainly it’s the biggest part of the problem: his body hasn’t been mature enough to be able to tell his brain that he has to go. SO hearing him tell us this, unprompted, was a sure sign of progress on the maturity front. Yes, he’s still taking medicine. Without it, I think there would be a bigger mess than we already have. And I still wake him up before I go to bed. My hope has been that eventually his body will produce an internal clock that will allow him to start waking up on his own around the same time I wake him up every night. That hasn’t yet happened, but I’m still hopeful.

For the past week, though, he’s woken up wet every morning, regardless of any of the other measures. We can’t increase his medicine because he’s already at the max. And, short of me setting my alarm and waking him every couple of hours, I’m not sure what else can be done. I’ve been contemplating talking to his doctor and seeing if we shouldn’t do some sort of physical measure of his bladder. In other words, I’ve been wondering if we should do an x-ray or something like that to see if it’s smaller than normal. I don’t know that anything can be done if it is, but maybe there is something that I’m missing, like a way to grow his bladder and make it bigger (not sure that can be done, but it’s worth looking into).

I really feel bad for the kid. His self-esteem isn’t very high to begin with and I can always see just how dejected he is when he wakes up in the morning wet. He’ll cry and tell me he’s sorry, as if there is something he can do about it. I reassure him that it’s ok and that it’s not his fault. But short of a breakthrough where he stops wetting the bed for good, I’m not sure what else to do for him. I’ve considered putting him back in pull-ups for bed time, but I don’t think that will help him at all (other than he won’t wake up wet). I think when Alex finally stopped wetting the bed and had his plastic mattress taken off, it hit Zach pretty hard. Nothing really seems to console him. I know he’s getting to the age (just a month away from turning 9) where friends will start wanting to sleep over, or want him to sleep over and I worry that it will still be too soon for Zach. I don’t want him to be embarrassed by it because it’s not anything he can help. But I’m running out of options to help him. I realize that with each year older he gets, the probability of him growing out of the problem increases. It’s just really frustrating to not see that kind of progress, or in our case, to see it, embrace it, then see regression.

Anyone else had this problem and have any suggestions that we can try? Please keep in mind the monitor is NOT an option for us because of dh’s work schedule.

Family, The Family, life, the kids | No Comments »

Well, the first week of school has come and gone with only minimal drama. Although, at the time, it seemed like major drama. The twins’ bus was an hour late the first day! An hour late! And no parent got a phone call (this is what really upset me). I had to call them to find out what was going on. It didn’t get any better the second day, either. It was 45 min late. Friday was it’s earliest day (to my knowledge) and it was still 30 minutes late. This is causing a problem for us. Not so much because no one is home, because Brian is home to get them. But the problem it poses is that, by the time they get off the bus, do their homework and eat dinner, it’s bed time for them. On the days I have to work or have class (currently M-T-Th), they have to go to bed when Brian does around 6:30 or 7. So those three days, they get virtually no play time, and certainly no outside play time. And since the twins just learned how to ride their bikes without training wheels, that is the more coveted thing to do during any spare moment of daylight they can squeeze out of the day.

I’m also seeing just how hard the school/work thing is. Not physically, although I am always tired. I can deal with being tired. I did it the first time around, I can do it again. But what really gets to me is Zach crying in the morning, not wanting to go to school because he wants to stay home with me. I am home with them in the mornings and Wed, Fri, Sat (afternoons and evenings) and Sundays, but I guess that’s not enough for him. I really killed me today to wave goodbye and see him waving at me from the buss, tears streaming down his face. I had warned them all, as best I could, that it was going to be tough this year and that they weren’t going to see a lot of me. But I guess they were not prepared for just how much time I’d be away from them. I think I’ll need to spend some one-on-one time with him, and the other 2 as well.

Please pray that we all get through this school year sane! It looks to be a very long one. I know it will all pay off in the end, when I graduate in may and the boys, Brian and I all see the fruits of our labors. But it’s getting to the finish line that’s the battle right now.

Family, The Family, going back to college, life, school, the kids | 1 Comment »

It’s back to school day for us, and since I haven’t updated my blog in…um…FOREVER…I thought today would be the perfect day to jump back in. I started back to classes last week. The boys have been both excited and apprehensive about going back. Alex was up a bit before I got up at 6 this morning. He was snuggled up on Brian’s side of the bed and as soon as my alarm went off and I discovered he was there, he excitedly whispered “I can’t believe it’s my first day of first grade! I’m so excited!” His brothers, on the other hand, were not so enthusiastic. Ryan was a bit more cheerful when he discovered one of the boys in our complex, who was in his class last year, has the same teacher this year. Actually, they both (Ryan and his friend) seemed a bit relieved. Zach wasn’t able to find anyone at the bus stop in his class, but he’s guaranteed to have 3 from his class last year, so I know he’ll be ok. Alex has Ryan’s teacher from last year, so he had absolutely no apprehension about going to school today!

As for me, well, I’m still falling into a routine. Today is my late day on campus; I have a class from 6-9 pm. Other than that, I’m faring well. I’m staying ahead of the readings, which is good. I hope I can maintain that for the entire semester. I need to do well this semester and next to solidify my grad school entry. Speaking of readings…I must go do some of that now, before my next class. Since I left my dinner at home today (the coffee pot being dead this morning should have been a sign…I also forgot to brush my teeth!), I must figure out what to do for dinner during my 3 hour break this evening. It will probably consist of eating in the Union, even though it’s super expensive. But at least it leaves me plenty of study time!

The Family, blogging, going back to college, life, school, the kids | No Comments »

My 6 yo is insisting on testing all the limits known to mankind. He’s generally a good kid, don’t get me wrong, but, boy, that kid has cajones! We never really had a problem until he turned 6. Once 6, he thought that none of our rules applied to him. I have no idea what gave him that impression. When I’m giving them “the rules” he’s always the one that says “Me, too, mommy?” And I have to remind him that Yes, the rules apply to him, too. Yet when he’s playing or on his own (and not occupied playing with his brothers or me), he forgets that there are any rules that exist at all!

Take, for instance, his insistence on crossing the street without letting us know. Yes, he’s 6, and yes, we live in a townhouse development way back from the main street. However, there are still plenty of people that tear through the parking lot like bats out of hell, despite the fact that are a zillion kids around. So, if he’s going to cross the street, I want to watch to make sure he’s safe (especially since they have a failure when it comes to looking before they run out into the street). We’ve had this problem with him before, where he told me he was going one place, and ended up crossing the street to go to another. Today was one of those days.

We have given him every punishment imaginable and nothing phases him (which is another problem all its own). I don’t know what to do with him anymore. I’m really and truly at a loss. I’m hoping it’s just a rebellious phase and that this, too, shall pass. Unfortunately, not having experienced this with the twins, I dunno. I’m sure we’re not the only ones to experience this, even though it sure seems like it. All I can say for him is that he’s lucky I’d already had my coffee and that they are leaving for 3 weeks on Saturday. Otherwise, his punishment would be much, much worse. mIf he keeps this up, he’ll be lucky to make it to 7…

Family, life, the kids | No Comments »

The boys are all due for their yearly physicals, so I scheduled the twins for theirs today. Might as well get them done and out of the way early, no? I was amazed to see just how much they’d grown in a year! Zach has gained 8.5 pounds and grown 2.25 inches. Not super growth in terms of height, but I was shocked at how much weight he’d gained. He still looks lean and lanky and he’s still bony (lol), but the doc said he’d progressed fine in terms of height vs weight. He’s still on the short side for his age, only between the 25th and 50th percentile (closer to the 25 end, though). He’s 55 pounds and exactly 4 feet tall

Ryan, on the other hand, has gained a whopping 11.5 pounds and grown 3.25 inches in the last year. I was much more impressed with his gains. I knew he had grown quite a bit taller, but I had no idea he had gained so much weight! He’s much better than Zach in percentile ranges, being in the 65th for weight and in the 48th for height. He’s 61.5 pounds and 4 feet 2 inches tall. If he keeps growing at this rate, he’ll be as tall as me at age 11 (I’m only 5 feet 1/2 inch tall)!

I’m glad they seems to be *finally* catching up with their same aged peers. Admittedly, I think it’s taken longer than most preemies. Maybe it’s because they were micro-preemies? I dunno. At any rate, seeing them against their classmates, they seem to be right in the middle.

They also appear to be starting to get sweat glands under their arms. We were worried about this, but the doctor said it can start around age 7. It’s intermittent, as it’s supposed to be. She said as long as they weren’t showing signs of early puberty, they’d be ok. So far, they are still prepubescent. That put our minds at ease. They were also due for a chicken pox booster. Zach didn’t even flinch! Ryan yelled “OUCH!” and then looked at me and said “Wait, that’s it? It didn’t even hurt!” I think the ouch was a bit premature, lol, and much more for show than actual feeling!

Now they are officially ready for third grade. 2 down, one to go. And he’ll be taken care of in 2 weeks

Family, life, school, the kids | 1 Comment »

Oy, I have been in a funk, lately, as it relates to the blog. Don’t know why, but I just have not wanted to blog/have not had anything to say. I am trying to rededicate myself to blogging at least semi-regularly. Even if it isn’t anything anyone wants to read but me, I guess that’s ok. I’m also going to try NaBloPoMo again for July. This month’s theme ought to be easier for me, since it’s routine. I have that down pat, that’s for sure. Even if our routine is mundane, it’s a routine, nonetheless.

The boys are finally out of school. They finished last Wed. and it was a heck of a day for the twins. They were bawling by the time they got off the bus. They so didn’t want to leave their school, and I can’t blame them. It’s such a wonderful school, and I will miss it for them. Alex will be there 2 more years yet, so we aren’t totally done with it. And I suppose it’s harder for them because their only experience with a new school was when we moved here; they knew no one but each other. They feel, at least a bit, like that’s the same experience they will have this time around (for those who don’t know, they are leaving the primary school, which is K-2, and heading to the elementary school, which is 3-5). Especially Ryan, which is not uncommon with PDD/ASD kids.

So, part of our daily routine has become talking about their new school and reminding them that they will still have their friends with them. They’ve been in the same class, with the same teacher/students since they started (A great idea for the primary school, I think. Whomever Alex has next year will travel with him to second grade, as well.). While they won’t have the exact same students, they will be placed together in groups of 4, so that each student knows at least 3 others on the first day of school. I also remind them that all of their friends are also going. They’ll all be on the bus together, albeit a different bus than before.

So, such is the start of our summer. More tomorrow on the summer reading challenges the boys and I are involved in…

blogging, life, the kids | 1 Comment »

Not much new around here lately. Just the same old work-home routine. We finally got a computer set up for the boys after theirs crashed awhile back. We’re trying out the kid browser Kidzui. So far, I think it looks pretty neat. The kids haven’t been on it yet, so we’ll see how easy it is for them to use. It looks pretty easy. We tested it out by typing in some non-kid friendly search terms and found that no websites came up, which we really liked. It’s loaded with something like a million websites approved for kids by teachers and parents. There area TON of websites for just about every topic a kid could want. I’m excited to try it out. If we like it, we may pay for the membership, which is really, really reasonable.

Anyway, Here’s a Manic Monday meme for today.

Do you screen your phone calls?
Yes, I do.

When was the last time you lost your temper? If we’re talking the last time I really blew my top, as opposed to the last time I got mad at the kids, it’s been awhile. I’m not easily ruffled, I guess, because I’m so laid back.

When you’re lost, do you ask for directions? I usually look at a map and try to figure it out myself first (if I’m alone). If I can’t, then I’ll ask for directions. I’m directionally challenged, so I usually always take hand-written directions with me so I don’t end up getting lost in the first place!

Family, Internet, Media, blogging, memes, the kids | No Comments »

Finally, after 4 1/2 months of trying to get it right with Zach’s medicine (see this post and this post for reference. What a struggle it has been. We started with one pill a night. That didn’t work. Even with waking him up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. He was always wet. And if he was wet when we woke him up, he would change and would still likely be wet when he woke up in the morning. After 6 weeks of that, we upped him to 2 pills a night. This was still hit-or-miss, but mostly miss. In other words, it was only slightly more effective than the previous dose. We gave this a go for about 6 weeks, hoping it would just take some time for the increased dosage to kick in. When it didn’t, we upped it to three pills a night, the highest dose he can take.

We weren’t really sold that the increased dosage would work, since none of the other had. About 3 weeks into the new dose, however, he started to wake up dry. A couple of nights went by and, honestly, I thought it was a fluke. You know, we happened to time it just right with middle-of-the-night bathroom breaks, the time he took his medicine vs the time he went to bed, stuff like that. But when a week went by and he was dry 6 out of the 7 days, I was secretly hoping this was it. Another week week went by and again, 6 out of 7 days dry. I knew this was no coincidence. One night he actually woke himself up and went to the bathroom, which has never happened in the 4 years we’ve been dealing with this. Last week, he was dry 6 out of 7 nights, again.

We had a doctors appointment yesterday and I was so happy to report the good news! We were really ready to throw in the towel. We’re keeping him on this dosage for awhile, then we’ll gradually start weaning him off. The worse case scenario is that that he reverts back to wetting the bed and we have to go back to his current dosage. He’s currently going through a growth spurt, and I can’t know how much of this current turn of events is due to that and how much is due to the meds. Probably it’s more likely a combination of the two. Either way, I’m sure glad we’re on this side of things now!

Family, life, the kids | No Comments »

I belong to an online twins site. One of our forums is entitled :Here in Holland.” It’s a forum for those of us who have children with special needs of any sort. I always perused the forum to see what was going on with my TCO friends who frequent the forum.

As of Tuesday, I am officially a part of that forum. We had Ryan’s official IEP meeting on Tuesday. He’s been getting both speech and what they call special services. The special services he has been receiving is simply a special education teacher coming in 3-4 times a week to help teach him strategies to cope with certain situations that may arise. She also tries to help him stay organized. They have been pulling back the services from the special ed teacher in an effort to see if he can function without her in the classroom. The goal is to arm him with the tools he needs (things like check lists, which he does great with!) and see how he does implementing them on his own. So far so good. If he can function with these tools and no support, he won’t need that support over at the elementary school next year. If we find, in the next couple of months that he needs the services again, they will be put into his IEP in May. Right now, though, he’s been classified as a student with a speech and language impairment. There were several times during the meeting that I wanted to break into tears. Not because anything bad was said, but because they had such praise for Ryan and the progress he’s made since they did his intake eval last Jan. It was so heartwarming to hear all the wonderful things they had to say about him (Zach, too!) and about us. I honestly can not thank any of those people enough for what they have done for him. It has been a difference we’ve seen here at home, too, not just in school.

Our next meeting will be in May, over at the elementary school. That way, his teacher, speech therapist, etc can meet with the incoming people who will take over. I think, at that point, I’m going to ask for those special service to help him in his transition. He is very apprehensive about leaving his teacher and his classmates, all of whom he’s been with since we moved here last January. I’ve been trying to hype up how great 3rd grade will be: they get their own lockers, he’ll make new friends (he’s good at making friends), etc. He’s just such a creature of habit, and thrives on routine, and doesn’t like change that I can see how he’d be a bit scared.

I wanted to share a poem with you all.

Welcome To Holland
By Emily Perl Kingsley

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability-
to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience,
to understand it,
to imagine how it would feel.
It’s like this….

When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like planning a fabulous vacation trip-
to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans..
The Coliseum.
The Michelangelo David.
The gondolas in Venice.
You may learn some handy phrases in Italian.
It’s all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off
you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says,
“Welcome to Holland.”

“Holland?!?” you say. “What do you mean Holland? I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy.”

But there’s been a change in the flight plan. They’ve landed in Holland there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease.
It’s just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It’s just a different place. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around… and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills…and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy…and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, “Yes, that’s where I was suppose to go. That’s what I had planned.”

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away…because the loss of that dream is a very, very significant loss.
But…if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things …
about Holland.

Family, The Family, life, school, the kids | 1 Comment »

I am a pack rat. There, I said it. I have things saved that I’ve never used, but refuse to throw out because I’m afraid that as soon as I do, I’ll have a need for it and then won’t have it. I have a huge Rubbermaid bin full of boxes that I have saved from presents over the years (the kind of boxes you wrap clothes in, mostly). I have another slightly smaller one with gift bags. I have yet another smaller one full of tissue paper, ribbons, bows, tags, etc. I save them all. I haven’t had to buy a gift bag or box in years! DH rolls his eyes when I start folding up the tissue paper to save, but I haven’t had to buy any of that in years, either!

Alex brought home an art project to do with the family. It was a heart that needed to be decorated. One of my favorite things to do in elementary school was to do tissue paper art. I instantly thought of that when he handed it to me and knew that’s what we’d have to do. What’s more, I knew I had the exact colors of tissue paper needed for the project! See, sometimes it pays to be a pack rat! Here’s the project, in steps:

Holidays, Valentine's Day, fun, school, the kids | 2 Comments »