Are first impressions everything?
We are often told that your first impression is your greatest impression. Often this is true. For me, however, there is one specific thing that makes the greatest impression; your handshake.
I remember many years ago meeting someone my parents had long since known. Upon shaking his hand, and finding my childish handshake to be less than adequate, he gave me some advice. He told me that I can find out a lot about a person by their handshake. It may not seem like advice, or seem very important at all, but I have kept that tidbit with me for close to 20 years. Each time I shake someones hand, I get an inkling about what type of person they are. If their handshake is strong and firm, I tend to get the impression they are a strong person. Not only physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. If I shake someone’s hand and feel as though I’m holding a dead fish, my first impression is that the person may be weaker than they outwardly appear.
Aol.com has a great article about what your handshake says about you from Careerbuilder.com. The article starts out by saying:
Have you ever shaken someone’s hand and in the same instant, felt every bone in your fingers and palm shatter? Or, even worse, felt like you were shaking the fin on a dead fish?
Handshakes have been around since the birth of civilization. In fact, they were originally a way to prove you had no weapons in your hand when meeting someone new (given today’s state of affairs, that might not be a bad idea). Nowadays, we use handshakes in meetings, greetings, offering congratulations, closing a business deal or sometimes just to say, “How’s it goin’?”
No matter the basis of your handshake, it should become part of your repertoire. Handshakes are a sign of trust and help build strong relationships. Imagine meeting a well-groomed, well-dressed expert for the first time — but when you shake his/her hand, you feel like you’re grabbing an infant’s finger.
How true this is. I have met people just like this and been completely surprised at how weak their handshake was. I expected them, by their appearance, to have a firm, commanding handshake. Needless to say, I was met with a completely different impression based on simply shaking their hand.
Another blog, written by Priscilla Palmer, reiterates how I feel about what handshakes mean to me:
A handshake is not just a polite way to say hello. It is an opportunity to show what kind of person you are.
If you just stick out your limp hand and look down at the floor you are essentially saying “I am weak”, “I lack confidence”, “I have something to hide”, “I don’t care to meet you”, and “I’d rather be somewhere else”.
A good handshake says “I am confident”, “I am honest”, “I’m pleased to meet you”, and “I am a smart, driven individual who is willing to engage”.
As you can see, your handshake conveys a lot of information in just a few seconds. This is huge for someone wanting to make a good first impression.
Yep, as I said before, when I meet someone with a strong handshake, they exude confidence. And when I am met with a wimpy shake, I feel as though they are weak.
What brought about all this talk on handshakes, anyway? Well, upon meeting and talking to one of the preschool dads today when I went to pick up A, his handshake was surprisingly weak. He’s a genuinely nice guy, and it was great conversation. But I was surprised by the limpness. I think it’s doubly surprising for me when I meet a man with that kind of handshake because I’m not expecting it.
So, why should you care what some Joe Schmoe off the streets thinks about your handshake? Chances are you aren’t changing your shake based on the people you are meeting. For instance, you won’t have one handshake for a business encounter and a completely different one for, say, the parent of one of your child’s friends. Furthermore, says the careerbuilder article, your handshake can go a long way in getting you that job you’ve been angling for:
Prospective employers said they’re more likely to overlook visible body piercings and tattoos than an ineffective handshake, according to a 2001 survey of human resources professionals. Plus, when you shake hands with people upon meeting, they’re two times more likely to remember you than if you didn’t shake hands, according to a study by the Incomm Center for Trade Show Research.
(The article goes on to list the 10 worst handshakes to avoid and does a pretty good job at covering what you can do to fix your handshake, should you find that your style is on that list.)
I’ll be the first one to tell you that I am bad with names. Not just bad, B-A-D. I can generally remember a face, but a name, not-so-much. Ask my husband, he can attest to that. He’s the name guru. I do, however, remember a person’s handshake. So, the bottom line is, if you want me to remember you, for better or for worse, shake my hand 
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Thank you for quoting me and my blog. As you know, I agree whole heartedly with your article.
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Great Post! Thanks for inspiring me. I really enjoy the content of your blog.
Love & Gratitude,
Tina
Think Simple. Be Decisive.
~ Productivity, Motivation & Happiness
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