Day 2 of the new school year and all seems to going well. We decided to split Ryan and Zach up this year. There were several reasons for it, and it was a very hard decision. So hard for me, in fact, that I wasn’t entirely sure until yesterday (the first day of school) that it was the right decision. I’ve been preparing them for it all summer, and though they told us they were ok with not being in the same class, you never really can tell with 6 year olds, ya know? I felt better walking out of school yesterday morning after dropping them off after seeing that they each had friends in their class. In fact, all but one of the kids from their kindergarten class last year are split up between their two classes. Their teachers seem very sweet. Zach has a new teacher, or at least one that is new to their school. She’s even more bubbly and sweet than Ms. K., and I didn’t think that was possible! They see each other at lunch and at recess, and I think that helps.
One of the reasons we decided to split them up was for identity purposes. They were (and likely still are) affectionately known around the school by their last name, and I know that the biggest reason for that is that no one could/can tell them apart. I have always said that, even though they are identical twins, they are each their own person. They have completely different personalities and have different likes and dislikes (though they share many of the same likes and dislikes). They are two different people, and I’ve always vowed to raise them as such. Being twins is just what makes them special. It doesn’t define who they are. I try very hard not to refer to them as “the twins,” especially not within earshot of them. It’s hard to do, and I do sometimes refer to them as that, but I make a conscious effort not to. They have never been the kind to correct people about their names, but I think now people will start calling them by their first names, rather than by their last.
Another reason we decided to separate them was for academics. We’ve not seen them rely on one another to do their work yet, but I don’t want it to get to that point, either. They are very competitive by nature, and I think the less pressure they feel to compete against each other in school, the better. I expect that there will be a competitive nature throughout their life, and certainly they will feel that toward others in their class who grasp things either slower or more quickly than they do. But if I can give them a break from each other competitively, I will. Besides that, I think being together 24/7 is not necessarily a good thing for any siblings. Everyone needs a break sometime. And now they can be who they are without feeling like they have to be just like their brother.
Seing and hearing about their first two days of school has put my mind at ease about splitting them up. We’ll probably keep it this way until they are old enough to make that decision for themselves or if we see that it’s causing problems in school (since they are so super close). Honestly, it seems to be drawing them closer together. There is less fighting at home after school, and more cooperation. Yeah, yeah, I know it’s only the second day of school. It may not last. But then again, it might. Only time will tell.
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